Thursday, June 11, 2009

Kids Old People Say the Darndest Things...

Let me start off by saying that my beloved, crazy, hilarious great aunt is in the hospital. She's been having stomach issues for almost a month now and finally went to the doctor this week. Yesterday they had her get a cat scan and decided that she has acute diverticulitis. The doctor recommended she be hospitalized for 3 days to get IV antibiotics and fluids. At first she refused. She told him that she couldn't go to the hospital because her grand daughter was flying in to spend a couple of days with her. The doctor said, "What?! You've been in so much pain and you're still going to go home?" So, he said she could take some stronger medicine by mouth and go home. Well, she changed her mind after she talked to her son and her primary doctor (who called her from his vacation to tell her he thinks she should go to the hospital). So she went to the hospital around 5:30 last night. Mom and the three of us girls went to visit her last night and she was tickled to death to see us. The doctor still hadn't been in and so we were waiting with her to hear from them.

As we were sitting there last night we were talking, and if you know my great aunt you know she talks a mile a minute and changes subjects in the same breath. Well, she was talking about how she was watching some soap opera and this lady was crying about this and what was she crying about. Then this guy came in and he was really tall. Is she really short? Then another girl was in the hospital and who was she? Then a guy came in crawled into bed with her, and well, they were both laying in that hospital bed.... on and on she goes. Then she says, "I wonder how I can get that kind of service?" OMG! We were laughing so hard, we thought we were going to be kicked out. The conversation quickly turned to homosexuals and pornography. Don't ask. You had to be there to follow that big jump in conversation and even with us there it was hard to follow. We were cracking up.
Then she starts talking about kissing. Oh my word... were we in for it then. She started talking about how disgusting it is when people kiss with their tongues and she better not see anybody doing that to us. Or us doing that to some guy. [I assume she was talking to Hol, Lis, and I. However, she kept looking at me when she was saying that. Uh, what gave her the idea that I've been "tongue kissing" a guy anytime lately?]
The doctor finally came in, and she had him laughing too. He seemed very knowledgable about her condition and she liked him a lot. We left shortly after and told her we would all be back at various times in the next few days.

Well, I went back to see her today and she was still in a good mood. She felt okay, but she hadn't really eaten much besides clear liquids so that was to be expected. She was feeling a little sick while I was there, but she was still her humorous self. Out of the blue she asked me if I had ever seen the movie Uncle Buck. I said no, because I don't really care for him. She just raved about it and how much she liked it. That 'Cully Maculkin' is in it, you know? Back when he was little anyway. :) Oh she cracks me up! I love her!

I better get a move on. The three of us girls are going to see Keith Urban and Sugarland tonight. They'll be here soon to pick me up. Oh, and I haven't even started on the rest of my vacation posts. :/ Sorry!


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